Afraid of a normal life

In the change-the-world-generation, we learned to be afraid of normal. At least I think I did.

Was it that the American norms of speaking out, spreading ideas… freedom of speech… set our expectations too high?

Was it that materialistic baby boomers in the church emphasized the message of pursuing higher callings to their children because they secretly felt guilty for how far their generation had swung into materialism? ( I got that idea from Frank Viola in Pagan Christianity.)

Closing out the decade of my 30s has me stirred up with everything that’s going right and wrong in my life. Has me thinking about life lessons learned in my 20s & 30s. And it has brought into view a few goals before my 30s are gone. (Yeah, I know I said I would devote my blog to catching up on some of the back stories, but I also need to press on to some new goals at the same time.)

See, I’m too busy tackling ever-evolving projects to understand the fear of failure but I am realizing I may suffer from a fear of normal.

Just like the world of computers can be reduced to 0s and 1s, and genes are turned off and on,if  life can be reduced the light of knowing and believing the truth, or the darkness of ignorance fear,  and believing lies, then this fear of normal was eventually going to show itself, right?

Is this the thing that breeds comparison and jealousy even among the best of friends? Is this the thing that breeds fear at our spouses’ everyday attributes? Is this the thing that has us ever-asking which activities we should and shouldn’t invest in for ourselves and or kids….   while years pass beneath our feet?

What if normal just means whole? Balanced?
What if normal means everything in its place?
What if normal is best?

This weekend my husband and I were able to share a rare treat.  We are both musicians, so you would think we love seeing live music together. Not really. Rarely is it the same person that we want to see, and as a family, the logistics are bad for individual entertainment.

But we happen to both love the music of blues rocker Doyle Bramhall. And going together to see him live without our children was NOT normal. Go us!

Yet my heart was a little troubled as the weekend went on. [Insert the inner-dialogue of an person who is watching someone who is living the life I once thought I wanted.] Years of travelling the world with beautiful people has cost him his marriage and a life with his two daughters. My normal life in comparison was becoming a beautiful treasure.

Yet, I have trouble seeing it. I thought I was too old to be misjudging these kinds of things?

It’s time for me to look around and see the beauty in the normal things, to value my true treasures.

I can’t manage all of the desires big and small, some of which are probably just a piecemeal covering over my fear of being normal.

And, really, it’s not that revolutionary.  It’s never a bad time for recalibrating and re-directing. And relaxing into Phillippians 4:8.

“[W]hatever is [already] true, whatever is [already] honorable, whatever is [already] just, whatever is [already] pure, whatever is [already] lovely, whatever is [already] commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything [already] worthy of praise, think about these things.

Ruth has Think+About+These+Things+(Navy)+web this scripture as one of the prints in her beautiful shop… here in white and here in navy (pictured to the left) or on pinterest here. {I tried to embed the pin but couldn’t figure it out!}

 

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To Pioneer

You can’t t bandperrypioneer hrow the word around lightly, but when it is appropriate, it is a precious word. Pioneer.  In a late night chat with Aaron and Ielyn Henningsen about life and music, and why we do what we do, Aaron said, “You’re totally describing this song we just wrote with The Band Perry called “Pioneer” and he whipped out his iPhone and played the ‘work tape.’ I can’t tell you how good it felt and feels to hear words that speak what you feel…and to know the friends across the table understand what you’re feeling. The song came out his week and just gave me a big fat boo hoo session.

Sample clip here:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/pioneer/id615443772

Lyrics:

Oh Pioneer
I sing your song
It’s the hymn of those who’ve gone before and those who carry on
Pioneer
Your work is hard
But the future of us all rests on the shoulders of your heart

Where are we going
Oh I don’t know
But still I’ve got to go
What will become of us
Oh I don’t care
All I know is I’ll go anywhere
Pioneer

Oh Pioneer
So young and brave
Be careful of the careful souls who doubt you along the way
Pioneer
You orphaned child
Your mother is adventure and your father is the wild

Where are we going
Oh I don’t know
But still I’ve got to go
What will become of us
Oh I don’t care
All I know is I’ll go anywhere
Pioneer

Let your heart not be troubled

I won’t run when bullets chase me
I won’t rest where arms embrace me
I will love when people hate me
I won’t hush, no you can’t make me
Send the dark but it won’t break me
You can try but you can’t change me
Take my life, they will replace me
I won’t hush, no you can’t make me
I won’t hush, no we will sing

Where are we going
Oh I don’t know
But still I’ve got to go
What will become of us
Oh I don’t care
All I know is I’ll go anywhere
Pioneer

Let your heart not be troubled.